Wednesday 28 October 2009

coldsnstuff...


In case you haven’t guessed by the changing of the leaves from green to gold, the shortening of the days and the fact that it happens every year at around this time; winter is upon us. Yes-siree the time has come to dig out your winter hat and gloves and prepare your self for the imminent attack from cold and flu viruses. No one is immune to the common cold (the average adult catches two to four colds a year.) It’s ok when you’re a child and you can rely on a day off school as well as being tended to by family who ply you with lemon and honey tea and Cowpol (yum.) But now we are ‘adults’ and have work obligations and essay deadlines to meet we do not have the luxury of being able to take a couple of days off and not just that; no one actually wants to be ill. I have done some intense scientific research and come to the conclusion that there are several different stages of illness predominant in the student-type-persons. Firstly there is the most common ‘snotty nose and cough’ stage, then the headache, the sweats, followed the highly undesirable 24 hour dihorreah and vom combo alternatively there is the hypochondriac stage (usually just a hangover.)
And so, as I’m such a gem, I decided to extend upon the Department of Health’s genius ‘Catch it, Bin it, Kill it’ campaign in order to help you lovely Bath Spa folk shun the sniffles. What follows is a thoroughly researched and some may say controversial Do’s and Don’ts guide to avoiding illness this winter (not actual medical advice!)

DO: Maintain good hygiene by regularly washing your hands with hot water and soap.

DON’T: spend your weekends hanging out at Bath’s drop in centre.
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DO: Wear appropriate clothing, wrap up warm; short skirts and knee high socks may look good but no one looks good with a hacking cough and runny nose.

DON’T: start up a new hobby of smoking in a bid to be more like style icon Dot Cotton.

DO: Get plenty of rest to help strengthen your immune system (that’s more than three hours a night)

DON’T: continually touch your eyes and mouth after travelling on public transport, handy tip; if taking the orange bus into uni make sure you wear gloves and maybe even some swimming goggles (one can never be to careful!)

DO: preserve a well balanced diet - this does not include microwave meals and domino’s pizza.

DON’T: embark on a mission to break a world record of how many naked people you can fit into an outdoor pool mid November.

I would also recommend checking out Holland and Barrett’s super BOGOF offer and if all else fails I’m afraid you’re beyond all reasonable help, I suggest bombarding your local GP with phone calls regarding the symptoms of swine flue! Happy cold season!

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